I ate ALL the macros.....blech

I've gotten into a bit of a donut habit (Sammons' Bakery y'all), but it's ok because I make it fit my macros. It's not that hard really. I just cut the PB out of my oatmeal and trim out some fat and carbs in other places. It makes me happy to eat a yummy donut when I finish lifting.

But then I lost control and did the cardinal sin of healthy eating; I slipped up and then said "Well, I blew it. Might as well go for the gusto!"

And Tuesday I paid for it by being physically ill.

Let me tell you how this started. On Sunday we went out to eat with some friends and I saved up macros to splurge on the Whipped Cream Oreo stuff at the Chinese restaurant. NOMNOM. But, because it was sooo good and I "deserved" it, I ate two helpings. No big deal, right?

Then on Monday morning I got a nice little chocolate donut to eat post lifting and it was great. I didn't eat much else because the Paleo Gainz lady was coming to the box that afternoon and I wanted to have lots of macros left to sample all her delicious goodness. And boy was it good! And everything was fine until she packed up to leave and left a multitude of sweet treats. And even though it's Paleo, it was still dangerous. Imagine eating 10 LaraBars in one sitting. That's basically what I did.

At home that night, even though I was full and felt gross, I went into full "WTH" mode and ate not one, but TWO biscotti!

And then I wake up Tuesday morning feeling hungover and crappy and with a resolve to get this crap back under control. The Arnold is 36 days away and I cannot be doing this binge thing. And that lasts until I get to the box and Paleo Crack is staring at me. So I eat some. Then some more. Then I eat Paleo Pancakes (yes, plural and more than 2). And then I decide that I simply cannot do my workout until I have a donut. So I get in the car and drive to Sammons' and get TWO. One pre and one post WOD, you know, to cover my bases. And one was just a simple chocolate donut. But the other.....oh the other.... a lovely, fat cream filled chocolate donut that weighed about 6 pounds by itself.

So I start doing my warm up and feel a lot of yucky. Imagine how you feel when you try to workout the day after the stomach flu. Everything was slow motion and it was heavy. I failed on my last set of bench presses and thank my lucky stars I didn't clamp the weights because I had to dump them off me. Even though I feel like poo, I tell myself this is all my own fault and that I have to PUSH THROUGH. I do part two of my 6 part workout and then call it for the time being and eat my second donut. Of course, I already feel like a greasy, sugar bloated dead fish, but by God, I want that donut. And then I proceed to pass out and nap for 2 hours.

I wake up like a junky needing a fix about 20 minutes before I have to coach.Everything is blurry. My head is pounding. My mouth tastes like morning breath laced with Crisco icing.  I text my child telling her that I will pay her back double if she will bring me a chocolate bar. Luckily, she was busy and said no. This is when I realize, I have hit bottom.

I have often told our athletes that just because your car has a flat tire, you don't take a knife and slash all of the tires. Just because you slip up on your diet once doesn't mean you just blow it up and that is exactly what I had done. I finally got my head back on straight and drank a bunch of Progenex More Muscle before I went to bed because I'm pretty sure all that was in my body was sugar and fat. 

I wish I could insert a little asterisk that says some details are made up, but they aren't. I really went pyscho! And I really felt physically ill. This morning I ate my normal oatmeal and then had meal two with chicken and veggies. AND I FEEL GREAT! The fog is gone and I can see clearly! What's scary to me is that I know better. I know how my body reacts to sugar and fat. I've done this thing before. But what about people that eat like this everyday and don't realize that the sluggish gross feeling doesn't have to be there? What about those of you reading this that do this and feel bad thinking you are the only one? Nope. We all have our weaknesses and slip ups.

Here's the trick. You have to pull yourself out of the slump. For me, it's easy because I have a reason. A goal. If you don't have a hard concrete reason to get off the binge bus  it can be really easy to stay in the Eff- It-Who-Cares Camp.  So right now decide why it's important to you to eat healthy. What is your reason? And it better not be "to look better" because that reason won't work my friends when you are staring at a pack of Reese's Cups. And the reason that it won't work is that those damn Reese's Cups will look way better than any of us ever will! :)